/feb/- February

2day, we r deh 29 of February, wich meanz deh 29 of February means leap year and meanz super unique deyh!!!! So yeah lemme juss write on my journal :3

Anywyaz Im starting to create more paegz for deh webbie, I'll remaek mah page for my ocz and all, and I am preparing myself maeking a pwetty paeg fa....🍀!!!!!!!!!

My gf offered me super cutien kyoot graphicz OF THOSE 4 LEAVZ CLOVER >_<

And uhm I am rlly starting to have like a BIG ASS hyperfixation on it, and uh am rlly excited 2 make big shit abt it, cuz yall can't understand how much cloverz meanz 4 meh 🙏🏾🍀🩷

Like I remember when I saw like a cloverfield of 3 lievz cloverz/ shamrockz, and I was so angry I had a meltodown..... CUZ SHAMROCKZ R SUCH FRAUDZ 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Yeah so I got huge projectz and chaoz 2 make... either I procrastinate, either I do my shit, but I STRUGGLEZ ARGHHH (HIII FOCUSING ISSUES ^_^/)

Today deh gymnasium were squatted by immigrantz so I didn't have sport.

It starts super well cuz I didn't wanted to have sport in dis back 2 sk00l

Plus, I alr finish school at 10AM....

Alalala, life.... u_u

Anyways I am too depressed and I keep bed rotting KEKKKKKKKKKK

And also , I have the impression I am cold w/ my gf, idk how to explain.
I rlly dpn't wanna b cold with her, but since I took high school again, erm, I don't talk that much with her, and I don't want this.... cuz I rlly love her, I geniunely love her , but idk how to express it correctly and it's hurt me so bad, I feel rlly distant.. Like yeah I wanna spend time with her, playing Roblox together or Rec Room with her, but I don't that much cuz no time coz am tired, even for me, it's piss me off, istg :(.
So I'll obviously try to spend time with her, if only I coulda stop to have insomnia or focusing issues.... I am a girl that is always tired, and I always fail to rest EVERYTIME, yes, I could like rest 4 4h but when I woke up, I am LIKE GROGGY AND WORSE THAN BEFORE.... It pisses me off so bad istg :(((((

Anywyassssssssss, I'm starting to have an hyperfixation on telephonic networkz and Internet and I found rlly old ass gemz

Like before, I was with Free, and I had the Freebox, honestly I LOVE THE INTERFACE OF THE FREEBOX ITB WAS PERFECT.

Like you got the integrated DVD, games, YouTube on it, gamez and even THE WEB ON ITTTT
I remember I played gamez abt Dora The Explorer on it....🥹

And it was the best life evah, like I coulda spend hours on it by playing Angry Birdz, MLP, Littlelest PetShop, Monster Life, anyways, nostalgic ahh gamez, ehh, I woulda like to play MLP again if my mom didn't prohibited me again kek

And then, we went on SFR, my dad went on Bouygues, and Bouygues.... it's ass.

AND SFR, OMG I LOVE IT SO BADDD.

They had like an huge catalog of free gamez with a offered controller so I coulda play classics gamez , like, Sonic All Stars Racing (BOTH WITH TRANSFORMERS), Sonic III, Sonic Adventure, Sonic Generations, Nights(mah fav ^_^), Saints Row, THE RABBIDZ ALSO, Titeuf, Taxi, anywyas, bangers to bangers till I grow up and my mom stopped for changing the box.

It'll miss meh so bad still cuz dis moment were I played wif my lil brother, we were so habbi.....

I also got like an huge fascination on the numericablez, It was a brand that got discontinued in 2014, but I want to come back at it coz ik when I was mini Berii, I saw deir add, esp wif dem monsterz coz dey were super cute <3
I think imma draw em coz I found dem super mega cute.
Plus deir logo make it super frutiger aero and I rlly like that loz, it rllyu show deh 2010s in deir prime :3

It's been a while I didn't talked like dat @_@

In a moment in my life, I highly tought abt my gender, I ever did a coming out last wednesday of being a demi-girl (and I am so proud of me!) 🩶🤍🩷

And I feel so much better since I've said...

EEE I FELT LIKE A DOVE XD

Anyways I've tough even am still questionning cuz it's juss like hard for me to adapt myself... and yes, me who always felt like a non-binary person genderfluid and bisexual... uhm I CHANGED YUHHHH ヾ(≧ ▽ ≦)ゝ

Since now I am a bisexual demigirl, yiss yiss, I felt mostly like a girl, but idk sometimes, in my deepest feelings, I do NOT feel like a girl, but more like a person, an human before all.... Idk how 2 explain, ik it's stupid asf for sum ppl but maybe leik, at 60.... I'll still search my identity..... Idk.... KEKKKKKK

Anywya just 2 say that yes, ur gorl Berii, the only one isn't non binary anymore, but a true demigirl!!!

Prid month didn't even start but I am proud of who I am, and I love my gender cuz it keeps me rlly comfortable

Sincerly ✌🏾🩶🤍🩷

I these moments, I am like super tired, like....

I don't know, idk anymore, life doesn't has a meaning for me...

Like I got disinterested so easily of like simple things (I still got my special interest but I mean other interest)... Like idk, nothing interest me anymore...

Time fly way too fast, I don't have fun anymore, I am bed rotting, I draw, code and go on 4chan.....

Like, I do nothing anymore. I would like to make stuff but everything is like so hard for me,,, I can't even do smth, my time of sleep is like awful asf and everything is like difficult for me.

Anyway I'll try to move on even it's hard for me :3

If I say my mom woke me up at 4 AM so she could get me at her work and takes pics of her, yall gon trust me??????

Cuz it's true.....

Like I went on her work to take some pics....

Plus, she wanted in VERTICAL 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 (vertical proffessional photos)

BUT....

I were like dead asf, I felt asleep by taking a picture.....

So, a guy caught us and she lied... it was something....

Plus I didn't wanted to do that allat bruv.

Sometimes, I had a feeling I have failed my gf, why.

Cuz like she is so sad.. And I don't know how to set this up.... Like I feel so powerless... Like if I coulda, I'll go in her house and save her her from all the shit she had like. She makes me sad. I love her sm and I hate seeing her suffering....😭

I had the best Valentines with my girlfriend, it rlly the first time I had Valentines with someone... so it makes me weird, and I wanted to be like the best for making gifts for her. It's never too much when it's abt my gf n I coulda even die for her since I am in love with her 😌🩷

So erm I did like a Flipnote animation for her and a 3D drawing, and a joke drawing of her and I with the Pico School style cuz OH GOD I GOT LIKE AN HYPERFIXATION ON IT

She is super cute and I only got eyes for her sometimes I think abt her and I am so crazy and I feel like a larva and I shake so bad since I love her sm, love can do crazy shit yk 🥴

Anyways juss to say I had like the best valentines ever with my valentine grrrrr best day evah 🤭🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

I rlly want to talk abt my girlfriend, Tina ^_^

So uhm already, yall need to know I love her like never and thank God to put us together likeee argh 🤭💕

But anyways, so, I took a lot of time with her and we played Rec Room together, we talked, watches her photo trough her tablet (IT WAS WEIRD KEK) and we drew on the whiteboard

And uh, even my english was like bad asf while I was talking and scream trough the game (yes of rage cuz of an Ice Spice obby game and of fear cuz of Sonic.exe,,, yiss yiss)

I fell even more close to her at a point 😭🩷
Frankly, I shoulda protect her of all my strengh, love can sometimes do pretty things 🤭🩷💕 She told me shit and oh God I never felt like the pain for her and she told me stuff that makes me more in love with her 🥺🥺🥺🥺 like she told me she is in love with me for long but she doesn't want to tell me cuz she is so scared to be seen to be annoying

Tina, if u see dis, u need 2 kno u r the most wonderful girl that I met and I am so happy to be with you... all my probs r gone cuz u r here, I love you, I love you, I LOVE YOUUUUU 🩷

Anyways since I dated Tina, my self-confidence and my trust in her is so hella STONGGGG, istg I coulda die for her, I can do anything for her, I am so happy fuiefzjf 🥹🥹🥹

I am on a party for celebrating the 18 years old of my cousin.

And how to say...

I was bored asf on there uhhh

And the WORST, is that my moil prohibited me like a lot of shit,,,, cuz she was so scared that ppl will gossip abt us.......😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑

I just wanted to wear a black coat.....🤡

Anywya it was weird asf cuz first they were like loud music but nobody dances, my cousin take a lot of minutes and SHE WAS LATE ASF, erm everyone were fancy asf except me, like I wore my pink jacket and the most scene things ever with my goofy clover hairclips, so I feel like a clown smhhhhhh, and they were like that girl who acted like a ninja, HELPPPPPPPP 🤩‼️

Anyway my mom had mad enough she just go earlier than before 😭😭😭😭😭

So yeah it was A PARTY UHHHHH

Ohhh, nothing better than being grounded by ya mom coz u burnt da chicken 🤭

Soooo I didn't know it was actually cooked so uhm I cooked up again n now she is mad at me and giving me reproaches

That's ALL she can do.

She NEVER congratuled me even for big shit, always reproaches but hey I am used too ✋🏾😌

Also I did some drawings for mah gf. Normally it was for Valentines but idgaf I gave her NOW coz fuck Valentines I love her everyday 🤭🩷💕

I love you Tina, I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUU 🥹💓💓💓💓💓

Love is such the greatest feeling 🥹🥹🥹🥹